You were perfectly fine . . .

if at first you don't succeed . . .

. . . rip it out and do something else!!! You may remember that I knit the Giotto tank from the summer 2004 Vogue Knitting magazine, and that I hated the way it turned out. I did find a friend who could wear it, but in the end we decided that the Giotto deserved a better design.

I did a lot of looking around at tank patterns to find one I thought would work, and I settled on this one, from the Phildar site. (Pattern is also in Famille Printemps/Ete 2004.) I'm about 1/3 of the way through the raglan decreases on the back, and I'm really liking it!

Man, I gotta say I really love the Phildar patterns. I'm always pleased with the results, and the only confusing part is making sure my translations are right. :) I also love that they put free patterns up on their site from their current magazines. It gives you a chance to try them out before you send away to France or the Netherlands or Canada for the magazines.

My other project is this:

It's Noro "ganpi abaka tape" in color 102, a combination of lime, aqua, turquoise and navy, interspersed with a brown which is exactly the color of a paper school lunch bag. I thought it was cool, so of course I had to have it. I'm crocheting a bag with it, and if it turns out ok I'll post the pattern in my sidebar. I'm using a 2.1mm (US3) crochet hook and really enjoying working with this tapey stuff.

Thanks again for all the support--it helps much more than you know!

defending our freedom

I've been so busy watching the Olympics and wrapping things up at work that I almost missed this in Monday's NY Times:

WASHINGTON, Aug. 15 - The Federal Bureau of Investigation has been questioning political demonstrators across the country, and in rare cases even subpoenaing them, in an aggressive effort to forestall what officials say could be violent and disruptive protests at the Republican National Convention in New York.

F.B.I. officials are urging agents to canvass their communities for information about planned disruptions aimed at the convention and other coming political events, and they say they have developed a list of people who they think may have information about possible violence. They say the inquiries, which began last month before the Democratic convention in Boston, are focused solely on possible crimes, not on dissent, at major political events.

But some people contacted by the F.B.I. say they are mystified by the bureau's interest and felt harassed by questions about their political plans.

"The message I took from it," said Sarah Bardwell, 21, an intern at a Denver antiwar group who was visited by six investigators a few weeks ago, "was that they were trying to intimidate us into not going to any protests and to let us know that, 'hey, we're watching you.' ''

The unusual initiative comes after the Justice Department, in a previously undisclosed legal opinion, gave its blessing to controversial tactics used last year by the F.B.I in urging local police departments to report suspicious activity at political and antiwar demonstrations to counterterrorism squads. The F.B.I. bulletins that relayed the request for help detailed tactics used by demonstrators - everything from violent resistance to Internet fund-raising and recruitment.

The link to the complete article is here. And a couple of follow-ups are here and here.

This is the sort of thing that happens in totalitarian regimes, not in America. I thought we had learned this lesson after the McCarthy HUAC debacle, the disclosure of Hoover's FBI files on MLKJr and so many others, and the fate of Nixon's many "dirty tricksters." All of those atrocities against the Constitution were "justified" by invoking the threat of Communism.

Is "the threat of terrorism" becoming the new excuse for those who would ignore or defy the Constitution? The threat of terrorism is real, but using that threat as an excuse to vitiate our precious Constitution is not an option.

Please stand up against this misuse of FBI powers. Write to your Congressional representatives and let them know that you support our great Constitution and all of the rights and liberties enumerated in it. Let them know that, as Lillian Hellman wrote to the House Committee on Un-American Activities (HUAC) in 1952: "I cannot and will not cut my conscience to fit this year's fashions."

And now, back to knitting. :)

packing up

Tomorrow is my last day at my current job, so I spent yesterday afternoon mucking out my office. You will probably not be surprised to hear that I found some yarn that I had bought on eBay and never taken home! Just a little reminder from the universe about what's really important.

I'm kind of a packrat (stop that laughing!!), so it took several trips to the shred bin, but all that's left now is to take down my pictures of and by K, and the other memorabilia hanging on the walls: the inspiring Oprah essay about dancing with Tina Turner and learning to just dance, the badge from the Susan G. Komen 3-Day Walk to fight breast cancer that I did last November, a lovely birthday message from my mother-in-law, my American Ballet Theatre calendar, a copy of the knitting pattern to make gloves for the troops in WWII, a Keep Tahoe Blue sticker, and two Promises blue foil chocolate wrappers with inspirational messages ("Follow your heart" and "Go Easy on Yourself").

(see, I told you I'm a packrat!)

Now that I'm close to really leaving, I'm feeling much better and stronger, much more confident that this is a good turning point.

And of course, I'm knitting--I thought it would be a good time to clear off another project from my WIP pile, so I'm working on Cavendish again. It's a throw in Noro Silk Garden from Jane Ellison's Simply Noro book (it's on the cover). I love a few of the designs in that book, but this one really jumped out at me. Don't know why I put it down . . . if you want to see a picture of my work so far, check out the sidebar and click on Cavendish.

Have a great Tuesday, and thanks (in a deep and mushy way) for all of the support. It really helps.

PS: The lovely (and large!) teddy bear is the Bobbi Bear pattern from Blue Sky Alpacas, knit with Blue Sky Alpaca bulky. I got mine from Jimmy Beans Wool; they have a kit available, or the pattern alone is $4. You could easily make this up in another (less expensive) bulky yarn, and I probably will! :) Also, I had two full hanks of the main color left over (I used four instead of six--which is a lot of leftovers even considering that I used size US15 needles instead of 17s--my gauge ended up being 2.25 sts per inch, instead of the 1.75 called for in the pattern), and only used a yard or two of the dark brown (for the face). So if you do decide to go with the expensive stuff, share the dark brown color with some friends, and go with 5 hanks of the main color (or 4 if you use the smaller needles).

making new friends

I'm pretty sure that when my mom told me growing up that I needed to put more effort into making new friends, this is not what she meant. Nevertheless, meet my new friend:

I saw the picture of these bears in the Blue Sky Alpacas ad in the most recent Interweave Knits mag, and fell in love. HAD to have it. Luckily, this was pre-knowing-I-was-about-to-be-unemployed, so I sent away for pattern and yarn (Blue Sky Alpaca Bulky in fawn and dark brown). I used US 15 needles instead of the recommended 17s, and am very happy with the results. (Plus, I have a hard enough time wielding 11s and 13s without going TOO big. I'll never understand why people think knitting with really big needles is easier . . . )

It took (are you ready for this?) one day. About 5 hours of knitting time, including the stuffing and duplicate stitch (to tighten neck) and embroidery (of the face). The pattern is cleverly done so you have very very little sewing to do, and the hardest parts for me were knitting the arms (attached to completely stuffed bear--kinda awkward), and getting the ears right. The right one still looks a little off to me, but not enough to move it.

K gave the new bear her hug of approval. :) It's always nice when she approves of the knitting. You know.

Oh yes, and I almost forgot one more thing:

I finished the Endless Grey Stockinette Hoodie!!!! Yahoo! I sewed it up Friday, and put in the zipper while watching the Olympic Opening Ceremonies. I'm so relieved. As is my husband, who is so happy not to have to hear me gripe about the EGSH that he has graciously (more or less) offered to mail it to my sister for me. (Fearing that he will instead deposit the offending package at the nearest dumpster, I believe I'll mail it myself. Have I mentioned that my husband REALLY doesn't appreciate the magic of knitting? What a trial it is to be married to someone who is tone deaf to the lure of knitted love. Lucky for him, he does the grocery shopping and cleans the house, so I have to keep him.)

The bear was my reward for persevering on the EGSH against the lure of (many many) other projects. I rationalized that the bear should jump ahead in the project line because unemployed girls need extra hugs. Right?

lovely things!

I love my secret pal!! Perhaps sensing that I could use a little pick-me-up, my secret pal sent me a lovely deep purple envelope bag, and a delicate golden leaf. I love them both. Thank you, SP!!

Also, as you see in the background, I am blocking the last two pieces of the endless grey hoodie. I'm about half finished sewing it up and weaving in the ends, and I can't wait to finish! I think it's going to turn out nicely (so far so good), and I hope my sister will like it.

A few observations--The Jo Sharp Desert Garden Aran cotton is holding up well, and blocks out nicely. Like most cotton, it shows the imperfections in my stitching, but that's life. Because of this, I was worried about weaving in the ends, afraid they would show through. I tried a couple of different things, but the thing that definitely worked best was a sort of reverse duplicate stitch--following the stitches, but on the back side. It doesn't show through at all, and you can only tell where I did it if you hold the sweater up to the light.

Also, the next time I knit with cotton or any similar cotton blend, I'm going down a needle size. Usually with wool my gauge works out all right in the needle size called for, but in cotton I must knit looser and/or the cotton can't stretch and bounce back the way wool does.

And one final comment: this sweater weighs a lot. Seriously. I imagine an adult sweater this size in Rowan ASC probably would be heavy too, but definitely consider that if you're a small person. This comes pretty close to being a weight-bearing exercise. :) Of course, since I DID buy the yarn by weight, and it was 24 50g balls . . . I guess I should expect the sweater to weigh about 1200g (2.645547146218532 pounds).

And they said math wouldn't be applicable to real life . . .

One more thing--
Thank you so much to all of my pals who have sent emails and comments--you rock!!! :)

life in america

3D Animated Flags--By 3DFlags.com

I am an American and a patriot. I love my country and its Constitution. Especially its Constitution. Our Constitution is precious and miraculous, in my view--not perfect, but as near as I ever hope to see.

Personally, I believe that the provisions of both the U.S. Constitution and the California Constitution proscribe and should proscribe the discrimination against gays and lesbians in many areas, including the refusal allow them to legally marry. And I believe that one day in the not-too-distant future, this kind of discrimination will be found unlawful and unconstitutional. Like segregation, a scant 50 years ago, this discrimination will be struck down, and 50 years from now people will look back on this debate and be embarrassed for the bigots that perpetuated the discrimination and argued to continue it in perpetuity. Our descendants will be amazed that so many refused to recognize the obvious wrong being committed. Just as we are amazed and outraged today when Trent Lott publicly admires segregationist presidential candidates of 50 years ago.

And when the History Channel does a show in 2054 about the history of discrimination against gays and lesbians, it will have to mention Gavin Newsom and San Francisco. It will have to mention today's decision by the California Supreme Court to invalidate the marriage licenses issued in SF this year. I can only hope that the discussion of that decision will be a brief footnote on the way to discussing the decision by that court or a higher one that invalidates Prop. 22 as unconstitutional and, well, just plain mean.

I thought and still think that Gavin Newsom is so brave for taking a stand on behalf of equal rights for all, and for speaking out about the injustice that prevents gays and lesbians from marrying. I hope that someday he is recognized for helping to lead the movement that ends that injustice.

But I also think that, however painful it is to face the thousands of happily married families now torn apart by the court's decision today, and however much I wish that the court had taken the opportunity to rule on the constitutionality of Prop 22 and its ilk, the California Supreme Court did what it had to do.

We are, as the court quotes (and corrects) John Adams, "'a nation of laws, not men' (or women)." We cannot allow a local authority to refuse to enforce assault weapons bans, or sexual predator registration, or access to family planning and abortion services, or desegregation orders simply because that official is ideologically opposed to those laws and believes them to be unconstitutional. If the court had ruled otherwise, you can be sure that conservative local officials would start tomorrow flouting the laws with which they disagreed. Soon, the laws crafted by legislatures and interpreted by courts and implemented by the executive would mean nothing in the face of arbitrary local actions.

Our Constitutional democracy depends on upholding the law as it stands today, and following the procedures in place to change that law when it needs changing. A lasting victory for gay and lesbian marriages can only come when the law itself is followed and respected. It takes longer and it hurts more, but in the end, when discrimination against gays and lesbians is finally ruled unconstitutional, there will be no precedent for local mayors and other officials to stand on to deny those hard-won rights.

I'm fighting on.

PS--I know, someone is going to say: this is a knitting blog; please leave the politics out. Well, this is MY knitting blog, and sometimes when I'm knitting I think about more important things, like whether my lesbian friend will be able to keep her child if her partner (the birth mother) dies. You know, little things like that.

PPS--Besides, it's my blog. I warned you there would be invective.

strange days

What an odd week this has been.

At work last Friday, I learned that the case I'm working on is going to be transferred to another law firm in 30-45 days. On Saturday, we left for our planned trip to Lake Tahoe for a long weekend. Back at work yesterday, I got notice that the firm is terminating my contract in 2 weeks.

Yikes. I hate this feeling of being up-rooted and afraid! Wondering how the mortgage and the bills will keep getting paid is so scary. Even though I know I'll find another job, and everything will be fine again, I'm really nervous and a little sad. When I'm thinking clearly and feeling confident, I know that this is a chance for me to find a better job, and/or one closer to home. I just have to figure out how to remember that the other 95% of the time! :)

Now on to the really important stuff:
I have at last conquered the endless grey raglan sleeves! God, I thought I was going to be knitting those for the rest of my natural life! I would show you a picture, but frankly I can't stand looking at them myself, so I won't make you do it either.

Instead, here's a picture of K having fun at Lake Tahoe:

I immediately cast on the back of the grey hoodie, and then I'll only have the hood left. I don't know how much knitting I'll be doing for the next couple of weeks while I'm looking for a new gig. Partly because I can't seem to relax long enough to knit--I feel like I need to do something RIGHT NOW to be earning money! It's gonna be o.k., right? Promise?